We limit the number of 'defer' requests to DFR_MAX.

The imposition of this limit is spread about a bit - sometime we don't
add new things to the list, sometimes we remove old things.

Also it is currently applied to requests which we are 'waiting' for
rather than 'deferring'.  This doesn't seem ideal as 'waiting'
requests are naturally limited by the number of threads.

So gather the DFR_MAX handling code to one place and only apply it to
requests that are actually being deferred.

This means that not all 'cache_deferred_req' structures go on the
'cache_defer_list, so we need to be careful when adding and removing
things.
Signed-off-by: NeilBrown <neilb@suse.de>
Signed-off-by: J. Bruce Fields <bfields@redhat.com>